Food Noise, Regain, and the Nervous System Truth No One Talks About
- Sonia McIndoe
- Feb 28
- 8 min read
Updated: Mar 5
Beating your inner critic - and the food noise it creates
If you’ve ever wondered why you self sabotage - why as much as you want to, you never stick to the plan, you just can’t stay at your dream ‘happy weight’, I get you!
If you have thoughts along the line of;
• I always regain
• I can’t be trusted around food
• What’s wrong with me?
• I should be further along by now
It’s not a personality thing, it isn’t a character flaw, and it’s not a lack of discipline or willpower… even though for the longest time you’ve been telling yourself it is!
Think about it. Why is it that you can be incredibly capable, consistent and confident in other areas of your life, yet feel completely out of control with food and your weight ?? It’s not logical - it’s psychological, neurological and biological.
The longer I work in this space, the more I realise our relationship with food and our bodies is insanely complex.
Each of us come with our personal life story (the good, the ordinary and the traumatic - different for every one of us)
So, the complexity gets more complex. But there are more similarities than you’d think - definitely more than enough threads to work with to create real change.
In this blog, I want to explore how our inner critic and nervous system are connected, as these are two areas I work on with every single client.
Relying on food became normal because your nervous system has been living in survival mode for too long.
For many people on a weight loss surgery or GLP-1 journey, the real struggle isn’t actually the food. “It’s not like we don’t know what to eat and definitely know what not to eat - dah!”
It’s actually our internal stress response driving our food thoughts, cravings, urgency, and self-criticism. We literally hand over the microphone to our inner critic.
The inner critic is the voice in your head that never quite lets you relax, trust yourself, or feel safe in your body. And that voice fuels food noise. It feeds fear of regain. And it quietly erodes self-trust.
That voice in your head? It isn’t random. It’s wired. We wired it, so we can rewire it !!
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The Inner Critic Is a Stress Response
Your inner critic didn’t appear because you failed.
It developed as a protective mechanism - a way to stay alert, avoid pain, and prevent disappointment. Over time, self-criticism became your nervous system’s attempt to keep you “safe”.
Criticising yourself felt like motivation… or protection from disappointment. You have been trying to bully yourself into being better for most of your life, no doubt.
It didn’t work - instead food became the quickest way to soothe the damage you did to yourself - hence I call this self sabotage.
This is why so many people say:
“I know what to eat… but the battle in my head is relentless and the voice wanting the “off plan yummies” is the loudest”
Food noise isn’t about hunger.
It’s about emotional safety.
But here’s the problem.
When your nervous system perceives a threat - emotional, physical, or psychological - it activates stress hormones like cortisol.
High cortisol:
Increases cravings
Drives urgency and impulsivity
Makes food feel more “necessary”
Reduces access to calm, rational decision-making
This is why food noise gets louder during stress, exhaustion, overwhelm, or emotional pressure.
It’s not weakness.
It’s biology.
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Cortisol, Control, and the Fear of Regain - Why Regain Hits So Hard Mentally
Regain isn’t just physical - it’s deeply psychological.
Every time the scales go up, it can feel like proof that you can’t do this;
•. See? You can’t keep this up.
• It was only a matter of time.
• You always end up back here.
And just like that, the shame spiral starts.
Shame is like a cloud of despair and darkness that drives panic and urgency to feel better, to self soothe. Of course, the fastest way for us to do that is head straight to the biscuit tin.
When we realise we’ve stuffed up yet again, we often then do the all-or-nothing thing and dial up our willpower and determination to be better and turn on ourselves and restrict our food intake big time. After a while, that becomes really uncomfortable and can even fuel rebellion. Either way, we find ourselves back at the biscuit tin. And the cycle repeats.
Not because you lack discipline - but because your nervous system doesn’t feel safe.
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Self-Esteem, Self-Trust, and Food Are Deeply Connected
Healthy self-esteem isn’t just about confidence in your appearance. It’s about whether you believe you can cope with life without turning on yourself and without turning to food.
When self-trust is low:
Food becomes comfort, distraction, relief
Cravings feel urgent and overpowering
Decisions feel loaded with fear
One “off” moment turns into all-or-nothing thinking
When self-trust grows:
Food noise quietens
Setbacks don’t spiral
Choices feel calmer and more intentional
You stop panicking about regain
This is why mindset work isn’t optional - it’s foundational.
When cortisol stays elevated over time, the body remains on high alert.
This creates:
Hyper-focus on food
Fear-based thinking
Black-and-white decisions
Panic around regain
A constant sense of “I need to get this right”
And the inner critic thrives here.
Every fluctuation is more evidence.
Every slip becomes proof you can’t do it.
Every hunger cue feels dangerous.
So, you tighten control. And when control eventually snaps - because cortisol depletes self-regulation - shame floods in.
That shame raises cortisol again.
And the cycle continues.
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Dopamine - Why Food Noise Feels So Loud
Let’s talk about dopamine.
Dopamine isn’t just about pleasure - it’s about relief and motivation. It spikes when your brain thinks something will make you feel better quickly.
Under stress, dopamine-seeking increases.
Food becomes powerful because it:
Delivers fast dopamine
Lowers stress temporarily
Creates relief from emotional discomfort
Distracts from inner pressure
So, when you wonder,
“Why do I think about food all the time?” The answer is often this: Because your nervous system is craving regulation. Not food. Relief.
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Why Willpower Alone Never Works
Under chronic stress:
• Cortisol is high
• Dopamine is dysregulated
• The nervous system prioritises survival over long-term goals
This is why willpower fails when you’re tired, stressed, hormonal, or overwhelmed.
You’re not losing control.
Your brain is doing exactly what it’s designed to do.
Which is why sustainable change can’t come from tighter rules or harsher self-talk.
It comes from self-compassion and nervous system safety.
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Self-Trust Grows When the Body Feels Safe
When the nervous system settles:
✔️ Cortisol lowers
✔️ Dopamine normalises
✔️ Food urgency decreases
✔️ Thoughts slow down
✔️ Self-trust begins to rebuild
This is when:
✔️ Food noise quietens
✔️ Regain stops feeling terrifying
✔️ Choices feel calmer
✔️ You respond instead of react
✔️ One moment doesn’t derail everything
✔️ Chaos becomes control
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Awareness Changes Everything
You don’t beat the inner critic by arguing with it or replacing it with forced positivity.
You beat it by noticing it.
Noticing:
When it shows up
What triggers it
What it’s trying to protect you from
This is why journaling, slowing down, grounding practices, and checking in with your body help you step out of autopilot. Mindset work, like writing your thoughts down, takes them out of your head and softens their grip.
These aren’t “nice extras” - they’re essential regulation tools for long-term success with weight management.
For example, instead of:
“I can’t be trusted.”
You learn to say:
“I’m having the thought that I can’t be trusted.”
That one shift creates space.
And space is where change happens.
It brings your system back into safety.
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From Control to Regulation and Self-Trust
Long-term success doesn’t come from tighter rules.
It comes from regulating the system that’s driving the behaviour. And from building a kinder relationship with yourself.
That looks like:
Learning how stress shows up in your body
Responding to stress without immediately reaching for food
Understanding your emotional triggers
Creating routines that calm your nervous system
Eating in a way that feels steady, not punishing
Allowing imperfection without collapsing into shame
Choosing self-care even when motivation is low
Responding to food noise instead of obeying it
Each time you do this, you build self-trust.
And self-trust is what keeps you steady long-term.
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This Is the Work That Changes Everything
The goal isn’t to silence your inner critic forever.
The goal is to stop letting a stressed nervous system run your life.
When safety replaces survival:
• Food becomes food
• Cravings lose urgency
• Regain feels manageable
• You trust yourself to come back to centre
• Change becomes sustainable
And that’s the difference between temporary weight loss and lasting freedom.
You don’t need more willpower. You need the skills to feel safe in your body and steady in your mind.
This isn’t about fixing yourself.
It’s about understanding yourself. Working with your biology and psychology instead of fighting it.
And once you do - everything changes. You truly transform through internal motivation, not external validation.
You don’t have to walk this journey alone.
If you’re tired of battling food noise, feeling on edge about regain, or doubting your ability to trust yourself long-term, this is exactly the work I support people with.
You’re very welcome to reach out and have a conversation to see whether the way I work might be a good fit for you and where you’re at right now. No pressure, no fixing - just a supportive space to explore what you need.
Sometimes the first step isn’t changing anything… It’s being supported while you learn to feel safe again.
It would be a privilege to hold space for you to learn how to quiet your inner critic and overcome food noise and emotional eating once and for all.
Book a free 15 minute chat with me and let's get started.
Join me for a free webinar!
So, I’ll leave you with a warm invitation to my 8 Fundamentals FREE webinar where I share my daily to-do list and how I actually manage my bariatric journey day by day. It’s in an ‘hour of power’ where I squeeze a lot of valuable information for you into the 60 minutes on Zoom - totally for free. Ready for more? Let's do the groundwork together in small group coaching via Zoom, so you can join from anywhere in New Zealand.
About Sonia McIndoe
Hi! I'm Sonia, a NZ Bariatric Life Coach, who has had weight loss surgery and maintained a 70kg weight loss for over a decade.I walk the walk and have dealt with my own regain by continuing to use and hone my own fundamentals and strategies, which I share with you. Like you, I struggled with my weight...
I actually struggled with my weight my entire life. At 5 years of age my ballet teacher told me “I danced like a baby elephant”. I yo-yo dieted my way to a body I loathed and had given up on. Food was my friend - but it was a love/hate relationship. In many ways it saved me, but it was also slowly killing me.
I wasn’t convinced even Weight Loss Surgery would work for me … why would it when nothing else had!
More than 10 years post Weight Loss Surgery later and still several dress sizes smaller, I am the happiest I have ever been.
You can have the success you dream of too. I am so passionate about sharing how, that I work full time as a Bariatric Coach.
I credit my Weight Loss Surgery with my 70kg weight loss, but keeping it off, I credit to doing the mind work. It’s this mind work that I teach in my Mind Empowerment coaching programmes.
